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About Traditional Art / Hobbyist Member RhelnaFemale/Australia Recent Activity
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Critiques

Convalescent (A Novel) by Rhoder
by Rhoder

Firstly, wow. Not only did I love this book, but I loved it from the very get go. Which is more than I can say for many of the books I ...

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Convalescent (A Novel) by Rhoder
Firstly, wow. Not only did I love this book, but I loved it from the very get go. Which is more than I can say for many of the books I have read.

Not the genre I usually go for, but one of the best books I have read in a long time. Almost immediately I was drawn in as it was something I could relate to. By the time a certain mysterious newcomer came on the scene I was absolutely hooked. The characters were all so fleshed out, and Hailey in particular was highly relatable, highly likeable and someone who you found yourself cheering for. The relationships between her and the other characters had such depth, particularly with her best friend and not to mention this mysterious newcomer. This wasn't the usual wishy-washy romance. It was real, and hit the protagonist with some very hard decisions and scary situations.

The writing style read really well, and I found myself focusing more on story than technicalities. A good thing, as I'm only usually drawn to the writing itself when there is a break in the flow or a serious spelling or grammar mistake. I did not find my focus drawn to the writing even once, which is excellent.

Once I started reading this novel I really couldn't put it down. There was just no where to stop. There were no boring lulls, no uninteresting characters and so I just couldn't help but keep going. This story got me on a personal level, and I found myself compelled to read. You really did well to put yourself in the shoes of a 22 year old college graduate, and as well as a vast array of other characters. Additionally, you dealt with every situation, whether it was a casual day at work or something more sinister, with -what seems like- researched precision.

As I said before, it is not my genre of choice, so the chances of me picking it up from the book store would be little to none. However, that would be a giant mistake on my part. After having read it, I would definitely have sought this book out just for the value of rereading it. I am the type who does like to revisit some of my favourite books every once and a while and Convalescent would certainly be on that list.

This is my first ever critique, so forgive me if I skipped some critical details. This is my personal opinion on the piece, and though others may see things differently, I thought that it was put together well, intricately thought out and never waned in it's level of intrigue. I enjoyed it immensely.
Well, here's to my last day before university :( As you'd probably guess I'll have a lot less time to draw or write, which I apologise for.
But hopefully this time next year I'll have only one semester to go and then I'll be done for good! 

It saddens me that I won't get much time to write in particular, but I'm in the process of writing myself a personal timetable so I can keep up with my story. There's no guarantee that I'll stick to this timetable though... I never have in the past :s

So here we go... Back to geology. Eugh... I feel like I've been a student way too long :(
I was crunchy.

I was flavoursome.

I was tantalising.

Enticing, alluring, appetising, decadent, delectable, scrumptious, scummy, lip-smakingly luscious.
Some would even say delicious.

I was all the words that ever described the perfection that was good food.  That’s who I was, that’s what I was. Above all else though, I was afraid.

Mortified.

Pertrified.

Stupified.

The end was near.

I was lining up for the firing squad. On either side sat desserts and entrées. All of them were afraid, shivering in their bowls.

‘Order up!’

From the front of the line a crème brulee was whisked away on a silver platter. My heart soared for the dish, though despite its doubtless fear, it did not make a noise. Such a brave soul. I admired its courage. The line moved along.

Now it was me. I was in the line of fire. It wouldn't be long before I too were taken to the other side. Silently I willed myself to remain as strong as the crème brulee had. I had to be steadfast. This was my destiny. This was my purpose.

‘Order up!’

My turn.

Fear gripped me, as I witnessed the slow approach of the silver platter. The rumours regarding its shine did not do it justice. It radiated the brightest silver, and all my concerns immediately dissipated as I took in its twinkling gleam. It was beautiful... breathtaking.

My silver platter.

I was hoisted upon the glimmering tray, and found myself naked in the face of a refined moustache. The moustache twitched as it surveyed me.

‘Table 23?’

The tray wobbled, indicating the start of my journey. The swinging doors grew closer and closer, as apprehension once again overtook my composure. What would be on the other side? Was I truly facing my end?

Time was running out. Momentum was building. The doors fast approached, growing considerably in size. There was no time to think! No time to ponder! Suddenly they were upon me...

This was it! This was the moment! I felt small, my creamy centre quivering in suspense. Was this truly it for me? Surely not... surely I had another purpose. Surely I was more than this? Or maybe not... Maybe I truly was a simple dessert... nothing but a mixture of cream and sugar. But then again... maybe... maybe...

The doors swung open.
My Silver Platter
Okay... to explain...

:iconnurturing-narratives: set out an 'impossible scenario exercise', whereby we were presented with various prompts and had to write a piece on our chosen topic. All the options were wonderfully silly, and so I had to have a go ^_^
I wasn't going to post this as a deviation originally, but then thought why not... (I think we were supposed to anyway). It really was a lot of fun to do! :D

The prompt I chose was: 'Write a story about someone eating dinner, from the food's point of view.' 

I was kind of on target.. I just didn't get to the actual 'eating' part. Maybe I'll do a part two sometime... where the eating actually occurs.
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Okay so... Just an update for those who are interested...

I am currently writing chapter 6, and so I apologise for not uploading anything since chapter 3. I get stuck with editing so my new tactic is just to write while I have the motivation to continue on and then start editing when things slow down. I do feel like I am improving, which is great, and my characters are starting to shape themselves better... also great. 
Thank you to everyone who has given me advice and support so far, you've all been an immense help. I really appreciate it all.

I have now made a map! Which you can find here: Map of Tol (The Plight of Magic)
It's very simple, but hopefully as I update it along with the story it will begin to look a little 'fuller'. That should give things a little perspective (as well as stopping me from confusing myself).

Again, thank you everyone!

Rhelna out!
Map of Tol (The Plight of Magic) by Rhelna
Map of Tol (The Plight of Magic)
Okay so... Here's the plan...

To stop myself getting confused I have made a very basic map for the story 'The Plight of Magic'. At the moment it's very VERY basic because I don't even know where things are going to be myself (good planning, right? Bleh..).
So the plan is... As I add new towns, places, topography, etc. in my story I will update this map. That way you, me and everyone won't be as confused.

Here's the prologue for the story: rhelna.deviantart.com/art/The-…

Thus far.. (as I haven't yet made up a key)...
- The thick solid line indicates the border between the elven lands and the human lands.
- The broken lines are the borders between the mainlander human territories (seven territories in total)
- There is a square in each of the territories. This represents a lich tower.
- So far the the towns listed are Carrumdale (Greyden's militaristic home town), Janwall (the merchant town) and Foxwick (yet to be introduced)

So yes... Hopefully this makes things a bit easier and gives a little bit of perspective.

I think that's all I needed to add.. :O

So I present to you the land of Tol!

******

The underlying texture for this picture was borrowed from: :iconsinnedaria:
You can find it here: sinnedaria.deviantart.com/art/…
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Well, here's to my last day before university :( As you'd probably guess I'll have a lot less time to draw or write, which I apologise for.
But hopefully this time next year I'll have only one semester to go and then I'll be done for good! 

It saddens me that I won't get much time to write in particular, but I'm in the process of writing myself a personal timetable so I can keep up with my story. There's no guarantee that I'll stick to this timetable though... I never have in the past :s

So here we go... Back to geology. Eugh... I feel like I've been a student way too long :(

deviantID

Rhelna

Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
Australia
Hello fellow deviants,
I am but a humble citizen who uses my spare time to create slightly on par pictures. I use traditional methods only, though I'm trying to learn a bit about digital art.
So anyway, I mostly draw and occasionally write though only as a hobby in my spare time as I struggle my way through a geology course at university.
I joined deviant art because I wish to express my creative moments, and in return view the work that other people have completed.
During uni semesters it might be difficult for me to find time to release all this creative energy I barely possess and create masterpieces for you, and for that I apologise, but, hey, what can I do.

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Comments


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:iconshavypus:
sHavYpus Featured By Owner 18 hours ago   General Artist
Thank you so much dear,
for the loving support :heart:

Abscess by sHavYpus

:huggle:
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:iconrhelna:
Rhelna Featured By Owner 16 hours ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Aww thank you! :hug:
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:iconmeowmeowkitty123:
meowmeowkitty123 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the wonderful comment and the favourite! :) 
Reply
:iconrhelna:
Rhelna Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
No worries! Anytime! :)
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:iconmeowmeowkitty123:
meowmeowkitty123 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Writer
And thanks so much for the watch as well! :) 
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:iconrhelna:
Rhelna Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That's okay :) I'd like to see more of your work!
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(1 Reply)
:iconrhoder:
Rhoder Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Student Writer
Thanks for the favorite! I hope you enjoy the story.
Reply
:iconrhelna:
Rhelna Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I'm sure I will. Once I've finished I'll let you know what I think if you like?
Reply
:iconrhoder:
Rhoder Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Student Writer
Please and thank you!
Reply
:iconrhelna:
Rhelna Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Alrighty then. Here we go!
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